Sing her song, brush her hair and hold her hand. Tell her stories, hear her laugh and hold her gaze. Watch her dance, smell her skin and hold her close. Don't let go.
Aboriginal children aged 14 years and under, are 8 times more likely to commit suicide than non-Indigenous children the same age. This is a national statistic, that draws on figures from urban, rural and remote parts of Australia.
March 8th fell on a Tuesday in 2016. It is International Woman's Day. Social media was alight with messages, remembering the great, the triumphant, the struggle and the glory of women - feminism, friendship and families.A 10-year-old Aboriginal girl has taken her own life in far north Western Australia https://t.co/RuUqwS8TIX— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
But for those who knew, had heard the terrible news, there was no celebration, no reflection because a child, a girl child, a little woman had died.
She died on a Sunday, and the word travelled out from the remote Aboriginal community, shattering everyone who heard the tragic news.
What is there to say? How to put tears into words? How to describe the bruised heart? How to make sure this never ever happens again? How to remember her, how to grieve?
Two questions. How did this happen? What can we do to make sure it never happens again?
The answers are in a small community in a remote part of north Western Australia. Is it our right to pry? Does our curiosity multiple the anguish for those left behind? How do we support the family, the ones who grieve for the child they knew, of their blood?
You won't find the answers in Sydney or Melbourne, or even Perth. Most likely we will never know, even with the inquiry the WA government is planning to hold into the nineteen other deaths by suicide that has happened this year.
I'm going to have a ramble through my thoughts. Please note my TL will be about the sad news across media tonight of the 10yo girl who died.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Firstly, I need to say I don't know what the families wishes are. I won't mention names or details of the tragedy, their heartbreaking loss.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Mostly black lives are lived below the gaze of those who care to look our way. Or we are in rural towns that are not on any tourist travel log. Or we are in remote parts of the country that appear in documentaries and in pictures painted by media stories.The blackvine carried this tragic news over these past days & the wait began. For it to become news. For the reaction. And then the silence.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Stock footage, they use - the media when they don't have a photo of the people, or the community - it shames us all, these generic photos of actual people that reduce Aboriginal people to symbols, their faces turned away in a nod to privacy.
A child dies, there are no words. A child dies in this way, it scrambles the mind. And by the time the news breaks and people reach out to others in horror and sadness, I need to set the anger aside.Grief, shock, heartbreak, despondency and fear grips me hard when I think of the family's loss. And then the other creeps in: I am enraged.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
What are we doing with our power? We are not all of us powerless. I want to smash the world and have everyone stand in shreds in a wasteland and say, 'yes, it has come to this. Now I understand how a child could die. We do not know how to live, how will a child?'
We ricochet silently and coldly off each other now that those of us no longer have the rituals when death follows life.People care, I know they do, she was only ten. It will make us talk for that short time before we feel forced, obliged to resort to silence.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
In simple terms, every communique from mob is carefully scrutinised - for origin, agenda, accuracy, tone - by us before it ever gets to you.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Words are dangled in silent faces. How did this happen, what can we do to stop it ever happening again? There's a black hole where our customs used to be. We are in mourning, how can we talk about how to change the world now?You think we don't know politics? Governance? That's our life, nothing passes us without careful checking. And if we don't like it, we shun.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
We are no different from the broader community except for the shunning part. It looks like indifference, confusion but no, it's a rejection.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
We no longer mourn as a community. Death, it is everywhere now. It stokes the fear inside. There is no reprieve, who will go first? Who will twist this into just another day? Each hour of ticking life taking us further and further away from when a small child still walked amongst us.
But what has this to do with a dreadful event in a remote part of the country that most will never see? It is still part of the black world.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
I became a writer because I didn't want to be bound by other people's fears. I stay apart because there is no other way for me to be free.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
This is our culture now. We are small groups trying to survive in isolation from each other. We were not forced apart, we escaped the brutality of colourism: where the darker the skin, the greater the scorn for being too country, too secretive, too politically naive. For being too black. Troublemakers as they live and breath.
When it comes to what is important to Aboriginal people, preferences shift depending on the issue. There is no clean break between groups.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Urban, rural and remote - black, brown, white - old, young, new born - educated, book shy and cant sit still - halfway, in the way, lost. We are too many to describe. We are pushed and torn, battered and feted. We float on the river of chance. We are disturbed from our thoughts and powerless to care for our own when we are forced to fight for our right to be in our skin, unchallenged.
This tragedy befell a family that lost a little girl.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
I need to remind myself of that because where I come from, my anger is disrespectful.
In the main, for us all, the misery of Aboriginal lives will persist until it is not ok for any of us to sacrifice other peoples' children.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
I need to put myself firmly in this. If anyone suggests a treaty will fix this I'm inclined to say they take a good hard look at themselves.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
It's no secret, there are divisions along big issues. What's not so clear is what people want and why or even how they think they'll get it.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
If someone came at me (and lets face it, they won't) with the treaty-cure-all my first question is, mate, you ever WORKED with black people?— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Because what I want to know is 'just how long do you think a treaty will take? And in the meantime what happens to other people's children?'— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Where is the responsibility towards the health and wellbeing of other black people? We never had leadership structures, we had communities.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
In no particular order, we can expect conversations along the lines of...
Supporting Aboriginal families & children is critical. Many want a go at decision making, the talking-up part. But not so keen on hands-on.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
The most shocking example of misfire-advocacy I've seen went like this:— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
A news story from a remote area: grass roots action, family focus.
Old man spoke haltingly of his peril in speaking out.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
A Melburnian tweeted, outraged at a perceived lack of dignity: he's not a real elder.
If I could have I would have reached into my computer, took his device from his wifi enabled home and smashed it with a hammer. How dare he?— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
A few years ago there were ~700 vacancies for Aboriginal Health Workers in the NT. Many reasons given for this vacuum in service delivery.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
This is a problem across the health and wellbeing services delivery.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Remote work is hard, the conditions are tough but worse is the system.
Years ago, I was head hunted to work with kids. No one else wanted to. I had to be asked three times. I was not keen. I thought a person should be qualified.
The centre looked small and bare and boring. The kids were small for their age and angry. People wold cross the street to avoid us. In the end, the kids weren't the problem at all.
They were victims. Indifference, poverty, abuse, they faced more battles than a fully grown adult. They were beaten by the system, the town, their colour and the low expectations of the school.
I ran a homeless youth service: noisy, demanding, bright, funny kids.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Council: Can you stop them spitting!
Me: I'm trying to keep them alive
Most obvious solution when there there are more people than houses, is to have a safe house for temp accommodation. This was never approved.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Overwhelmingly the priority for a young person is some where safe to sleep at night when they need it. People will recoil in horror at the thought of children being found in some rough spot roaming at night but they should be gut punched with shock to hear that no government body will approve a safe house for children.
The reasons to deny safe shelter for a child make sense if you are a bastardised version of a human being. 'But someone gets welfare money for them, why should we pay more money to have an extra home for them?'People can care for as many kids as they can take unofficially in their home but there is no funding available to have a staffed safe house.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
But the state will pay thousands of dollars to house them in a detention centre or an adult jail?
There's a lot of blindeye turning when it suits.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
eg Kids at risk require close supervision. We were instructed to admit max. 5 kids/worker
The service was funded for two funded workers, this equals10 kids in our centre at a time.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
What do I do with the other 50 standing outside?
We had a socialworker in town.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
She saw 5 kids/week. One per day. But at least she was qualified.
We saw ~70/day. We had zero qualifications.
Who makes up these rules?— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Good question.
Services are not always community controlled. Even with claims of a 'local steering committee' etc
Read that one social worker will visit a remote community where a child died by suicide 'in case they are needed'. Definition of a band aid.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
My final remarks...
Beware of the 'dysfunctional' tag. Poverty and lack of housing can happen in a city but no one tags Sydney as dysfunctional. Or Canberra.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Don't confuse being fierce about land rights on the east coast of Australia with being an expert in remote community life in other states.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
If you advocate on child welfare, be exp'd working in communities.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
It's not a 'FIFO OR I saw it on TV but have a lot of ideas' kind of deal.
If you want to help to improve children's lives in remote communities:— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Do some research.
Donate for camps & materials.
Demand govts do more.
Mystified by 'culture'?— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Think about what you do with your 10yo.
Stories, art, dance, nature, animals, connection, safety
Culture is the same
What prevents kids from access to culture?— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Poverty
Homelessness
Overwhelmed and overcrowded family homes
Being fringe dwellers & unwelcome.
On sweeping reform agendas: they need to clarify their weak kneed asides that anything is possible & take some responsibility for the chaos.— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Care about Aboriginal kids in remote areas?— Siv Parker (@SivParker) March 8, 2016
Enough to apply some critical thinking to Indigenous advocacy?
You would if it was your child.
These words of yours are incredibly haunting @SivParker - challenging with their beauty & their honesty. Thank you. https://t.co/os9FCZRzRx— Naomi (@NaomiMCarey) March 10, 2016
No comments:
Post a Comment